Mmmm Monday

Today's Mood: Blissful

I hate missing days from here. This is a place where I find peace and clarity. Fortunately this weekend provided me with all of that and much, much more.

My Baby was here this weekend, and we spent so much time in each other's presence. She came in on Thursday, and didn't leave until Sunday evening. So of course you can see why writing in this blog was the last thing on my mind.

Where do I start? Maybe I should start with how I felt on Thursday as I waited for her to get here. I was a myriad of volatile emotions. Almost every feeling was tossed in the mix. I was excited to see her again after being apart for so long. I was nervous because I didnt know how we would react to each other after all the drama we have been through. I was...scared..that my reality would not measure up to her expectations. That maybe our first time together was a fluke.

Needless to say, my fears were groundless. We had the most beautiful time. I guess almost every emotion did come to the surface after all. I love her so much. Thats really all I can think about. As soon as I saw her, all doubts went out the window.

We had so much fun just being together. We did a WNBA game, which sucked cause we lost. We ate out at my fave place. I almost cried when I smelled the leftovers. I remember the way she looked at me across the table. Her feelings truly shine from her beautiful eyes. I think I needed to see her to know just how deeply she is into this.

I don't want to elaborate on the sexual part. It was spiritual to me. Im going to keep that part in my secret internal place, for only our memories to share. I will say that I went to places that Ive never been. I love her scent. I love her taste. I am enraptured by her moans. I was near tears so many times because even when we were going at it like wild things, it was an incredible merging of spirits and bodies. Physically we are perfect together but now that our emotions are more in harmony-it was unbelievable.

I feel like we are better everything after this visit. Definitely better lovers and most importantly better friends. What we have is like a little tender green shoot, just breaking through the surface and reaching for sunlight. We have to be so careful to keep it nurtured and not to give it toooo much light causing it to wither and burn.

I digress......

When she left me on Sunday, I was a mess. A total wreck. I was so miserable that I ended up laughing at my own self. It was hilarious, I was acting like the world was ending. This girl is the only person who has caused me to get in the bed, in the fetal position (lol), and act all super dramatic. Living the emotions is unusual to me. I can almost always shut down and just act like "its all good". Not with her. She demands that I give her all of me, honestly and completely. I guess by opening up it makes it so much harder to close the gates on my feelings when I want to. I finally got it together and went out with some friends to an L-Word viewing party. Thats about when my mind drifted from the loving, sweet thoughts to the hot sexual memories of the weekend. Now Im ready for more.

Thats enough of that for now. Today I have a final interview with this company that I like. I will write in tomorrow to report if I get out of this jail or not.